**This was written a couple of years ago**
I’ve been taking care of two kids all by myself, all day. Two cranky toddlers, who are both vying for my attention when all I want to do is be left alone. I’m so done with the day, I just want to put them to bed and grab a glass of wine and relax. Is it bedtime yet?
I’m feeling overwhelmed, stressed and I just want to cry and scream. It’s too much. My energy is drained, I feel like my life is going nowhere, I’m just a stay at home mom, I’ve lost myself. All I do all day is take care of two little wonderful kids, I don’t do anything substantial that brings in money to support our family or contributes to society. I’m just a mom.
I call my mom, in tears. She doesn’t pick up. Fine, I try my sister. Again, no one there. And I’m left, by myself, trying to pull myself out of this funk that I’m in. Now I’m angry on top of sad, depressed, anxious and overwhelmed. Life is great….
I start to think about what I’ve learned this past year. In my mind, I can see Eckhart Tolle telling me “There are no problems in life, only situations.” But was Eckhart Tolle ever in *my* situation? Gabrielle Bernstein always tells us to go back to a state of love. Ok, I can do that. And then there’s my mom, who is always telling me to breathe into my soul.
So that’s what I do. I take a few deep breaths. And I think back to a journaling session I did where I listed all the ways that I can connect to my soul. #1 on the list? Dance. I even posted it on Instagram, shared it for everyone to see, to make sure I would keep it fresh in my mind. Of course, it’s taken me all day of being disconnected from my soul to remember this list, but hey, I remembered it!
I grab my phone, open up the Spotify app and press play on my favourite playlist. Music instantly fills my home and the kids and I start to sing and dance. And slowly but surely, I start to recenter and realign. My boys are singing and dancing with me, we’re having so much fun twirling in the kitchen and the heaviness of the day goes away.
After that, the day turns around. My music stays on for the rest of the day, and as I’m doing all the mundane chores that a stay at home mom has to do, I am dancing and singing and I realize how much I love my life, how perfect life is right now and how amazing I feel.
All because I reconnected to my soul. Amazing.